Why we should treat family like friends or co-workers

The term "family" has often befuddled me. Perhaps I've been watching too many TV shows and movies that romanticize what a family looks like, but my imagination of family is where parents and siblings show their love for each other warmly, they reach out and talk to each other often, they have each other's back and would do almost anything to help another family member, comfort and encourage you when you are down, be your biggest cheerleader, and extended family such as uncles, aunts, grandparents and cousins are all similarly warm and close. 

My family does not look anything close to that. My extended family is far-flung around the globe and we've only met each other a handful of times at best. I speak to and confide in my friends more often than to my immediate family. My friends have given more support and encouragement than all of my family members combined. I am told not to share my successes with family members lest they get jealous. As such, many don't really know me as a person and what I'm up to. I am definitely closer to my friends than to my extended family. 

Oftentimes, family members have high expectations of each other yet take each other for granted. When they are upset, there is some level of over-familiarity, where they feel comfortable enough to take it out on another family member. Oddly, when we are with friends or our co-workers, we are at our best behavior. Most of us would hardly take it out on friends or co-workers trying to comfort us when we are upset. In fact, we thank them for their concern. Yet, with family members, we lash out at them...because they are the only ones with whom we can do so.

It breaks my heart to see how many family members treat each other worse than their enemies. Family members can sometimes get competitive, and for some reason, some family members get really wretched with envy that they say or do unimaginable things. 

It is easy for family members to take each other for granted. For those family members who tend to be self-centered, they expect other family members to always bend to their will. It happens for some time, until those family members realize that even friends value and treat them better than their own family. At which point, the question is whether it's necessary to give these family members all that slack. If they truly cared for you as a family member, wouldn't they at least try to treat you fairly? Why would they expect you to constantly endure the short end of the stick? Are people who are constantly taken advantage of by their relatives expected to accept that this is the way just because they are "family"?

If friends treated you that way, you'd decide that they are definitely not your friends, and you cut ties with them and move on. But with relatives, you don't choose them and society has an expectation that you always accept them no matter what. 

Is there a breaking point for family members who keep giving until they realize such family members are just sucking them dry of time, resources, and energy where they are better of walking away from such family members...even renouncing them?

Sometimes, it feels like the world would be a more peaceful and harmonious place if family members treat each other like co-workers or friends. There would be a lot more decorum and restraint, and a whole lot less hurt.