Who are you? No, really.
I was watching a re-run of an old sci-fi TV series called Babylon 5 recently (if you're a Trekkie or Star Wars fan, you probably watched this...for the rest of you, this is really a great TV series; very well written and acted -- highly recommended!). There was an episode where a character was grilling another, constantly asking her "Who are you?" and torturing her whenever she used titles such as "I am the ambassador to..." *zap!* or "I'm the daughter of...." *zap!* She was punished endlessly with exasperation for continually stating who she was by using external title references or stating what she does for a living or which group she belongs to or who she was related to in her family. It really got me thinking if I were in her shoes, how would I answer the question: who am I?
This is a really interesting exercise. It not only speaks to the people who are stay-at-home moms/dads or the unemployed who I've been told often dread meeting new people, but also for those of us who sometimes feel a bit empty despite collecting lofty titles on our resumes.
The American society heavily defines people's identities by their professions. It is near impossible for you to attend a party where you'd meet someone new who would ask what you do for a living. Why is that?
There seems to be an fixation on knowing one's profession rather than who they are as a person or what they love to do in general. I'm not convinced that asking for one's profession is the best way to engage a person in your first interaction with them nor make a memorable impression -- let's just admit that not everyone is Jeff Bezos. But even so, if you met Jeff Bezos, you already know what he does for a living, won't you want to know something that we don't already know? Wouldn't it make you a lot more memorable to him if you asked him a totally different question not at all about his work? Perhaps you and he would even connect on a personal level and he might invite you to that activity that you both enjoy! Ask him about Amazon? Doubt he'd remember you the next day.
If our lives are truly defined by our profession, no matter how much you enjoy work, that's frankly a bit sad. No wonder most people cannot remember people's names after a party because everyone is asked to essentially talk about the least interesting part of their lives.
Now, if work is indeed the most interesting part of your life, then perhaps it's time to think about what life is to you. I totally confess -- I am the pot calling the kettle black here because I absolutely love working to the point that I can't imagine retiring. But after working for 20 years, I am starting to wise up that work cannot be everything in life and I need to become aware of my core values and build an identity for myself around that.
It doesn't hurt to take a bit of time to make a strategic assessment of yourself. This would yield a strategic plan that guides the people you choose to surround yourself with, activities you pursue, conversations you want to have, and how you spend your time and money. It's all really refreshing! It's a journey that I'm embarking on, right now. So, who are you?
This is a really interesting exercise. It not only speaks to the people who are stay-at-home moms/dads or the unemployed who I've been told often dread meeting new people, but also for those of us who sometimes feel a bit empty despite collecting lofty titles on our resumes.
The American society heavily defines people's identities by their professions. It is near impossible for you to attend a party where you'd meet someone new who would ask what you do for a living. Why is that?
There seems to be an fixation on knowing one's profession rather than who they are as a person or what they love to do in general. I'm not convinced that asking for one's profession is the best way to engage a person in your first interaction with them nor make a memorable impression -- let's just admit that not everyone is Jeff Bezos. But even so, if you met Jeff Bezos, you already know what he does for a living, won't you want to know something that we don't already know? Wouldn't it make you a lot more memorable to him if you asked him a totally different question not at all about his work? Perhaps you and he would even connect on a personal level and he might invite you to that activity that you both enjoy! Ask him about Amazon? Doubt he'd remember you the next day.
If our lives are truly defined by our profession, no matter how much you enjoy work, that's frankly a bit sad. No wonder most people cannot remember people's names after a party because everyone is asked to essentially talk about the least interesting part of their lives.
Now, if work is indeed the most interesting part of your life, then perhaps it's time to think about what life is to you. I totally confess -- I am the pot calling the kettle black here because I absolutely love working to the point that I can't imagine retiring. But after working for 20 years, I am starting to wise up that work cannot be everything in life and I need to become aware of my core values and build an identity for myself around that.
It doesn't hurt to take a bit of time to make a strategic assessment of yourself. This would yield a strategic plan that guides the people you choose to surround yourself with, activities you pursue, conversations you want to have, and how you spend your time and money. It's all really refreshing! It's a journey that I'm embarking on, right now. So, who are you?
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